The Chant

Mandatory lacrosse attendance new graduation requirement

After+seeing+empty+bleachers+time+after+time+at+NC%E2%80%99s+lacrosse+games%2C+Principal+Horton+finally+decided+to+take+matters+into+his+own+hands.+Under+the+new+regime%2C+students+must+attend+at+least+seven+games+a+year+to+graduate.+%E2%80%9CThis+is+a+valuable+step+towards+equal+respect+and+visibility+for+all+of+our+hardworking+student+athletes%2C%E2%80%9D+administrator+Sy+Cophant+said.
Back to Article
Back to Article

Mandatory lacrosse attendance new graduation requirement

After seeing empty bleachers time after time at NC’s lacrosse games, Principal Horton finally decided to take matters into his own hands. Under the new regime, students must attend at least seven games a year to graduate. “This is a valuable step towards equal respect and visibility for all of our hardworking student athletes,” administrator Sy Cophant said.

After seeing empty bleachers time after time at NC’s lacrosse games, Principal Horton finally decided to take matters into his own hands. Under the new regime, students must attend at least seven games a year to graduate. “This is a valuable step towards equal respect and visibility for all of our hardworking student athletes,” administrator Sy Cophant said.

Harrison Glaze

After seeing empty bleachers time after time at NC’s lacrosse games, Principal Horton finally decided to take matters into his own hands. Under the new regime, students must attend at least seven games a year to graduate. “This is a valuable step towards equal respect and visibility for all of our hardworking student athletes,” administrator Sy Cophant said.

Harrison Glaze

Harrison Glaze

After seeing empty bleachers time after time at NC’s lacrosse games, Principal Horton finally decided to take matters into his own hands. Under the new regime, students must attend at least seven games a year to graduate. “This is a valuable step towards equal respect and visibility for all of our hardworking student athletes,” administrator Sy Cophant said.

Harrison Glaze, Artist/Cartoonist, Reporter

Hang on for a minute...we're trying to find some more stories you might like.


Email This Story






On Wednesday, March 28, Principal Bucky Horton announced a bold new plan to solve one of NC’s most pressing problems: the constant lack of attendance at lacrosse games. Despite the hard work, talent, and sacrifice that the school’s lacrosse players put into their sport, their accomplishments go unacknowledged and unseen, with only a handful of students attending any given match. In a stunning display of visionary leadership, Horton decided to find a solution to the problem.

“I always tell students,  ‘work hard, play hard.’ Well, I’ve given up on trying to make teenagers work hard, so I decided to try and get them to play harder instead,” Horton said.

The new policy requires that all students attend at least seven lacrosse games a year to graduate. Horton describes this as a modest, overdue show of respect for an underrecognized but integral part of the school community. Several students, though, disagree.

“I don’t see why sports always have to take such a precedence over my academics,” senior Leon Dorkenstein, Jr., said while solving atomic equations in the margins of his well-loved copy of Finnegans Wake. “I drive up here from Austell and back every day to attend the Magnet program. I have a GPA of 4.9. I contribute so much to this school. And yet this administration seems determined to, dare I say, punish us for not going to a sports game no one cares about anyway.”

On the other hand, NC’s lacrosse team welcomes the move.

“Whenever I get out there and play, I’m giving my all for this school. And my all is a lot. Not to brag or anything, but people call me the Tom Brady of high school lacrosse. And now people finally get to see that instead of just sitting like couch potatoes and watching the other Tom Brady on their television set,” junior Nat Handel said while sitting like a couch potato and watching the other Tom Brady on his television set.

At first, the initiative seemed to accomplish its goal splendidly; no less than 50 students arrived at Thursday’s game. As it turned out, though, only freshman Mackenzie White and sophomore Ashleigh Blanco, the on-and-off girlfriends of two of the players, had come to satisfy the requirements. The others attended to protest the new policy. Angry students drowned out the noise of the game with impassioned shouts and chants, waving signs with such messages as  “No Cruel & Unusual Punishment” and “Roses Are Red / Horses Wear Shoes / No One Should Force Us to Watch You Lose.”

After Thursday’s fiasco, anonymous reports from a source who wished to be known only as “Deep GOAT” have said that the administration has now begun to consider alternative methods of increasing turnout. Rumored proposals include a school lunch eating contest, which administration reportedly tabled due to public health concerns, and a vaudeville-style dance routine performed by the lacrosse team at halftime to the tune of “Hooked on a Feeling” by Blue Swede.

The Chant could not reach Principal Horton for comment at press time.

April Fool’s, you fools!

XOXO,

The Chant

Print Friendly, PDF & Email
 
Harrison Glaze, Cartoonist/Reporter

A current NC Magnet senior, Harrison Glaze has written and illustrated for The Chant since 2016 and currently serves as the newspaper’s Blogs Editor....

Leave a Comment

To provide a comment on a story, you must include a valid first and last name. If you do not include both a first and a last name, The Chant reserves the right to not post your comment.

If you want a picture to show with your comment, go get a gravatar.




Navigate Left
  • Mandatory lacrosse attendance new graduation requirement

    Investigative

    Leap year shaping the futures of emerging artists

  • Mandatory lacrosse attendance new graduation requirement

    News

    NC student put their best dress forward ahead of their DECA compeition

  • Mandatory lacrosse attendance new graduation requirement

    Features

    A send off to a Warrior: Remembering Dr. G

  • Mandatory lacrosse attendance new graduation requirement

    Features

    Travel: A road to the mind and soul

  • Mandatory lacrosse attendance new graduation requirement

    Entertainment

    Super Smash Bros Ultimate: Nintendo at its finest

  • Mandatory lacrosse attendance new graduation requirement

    Entertainment

    DIY gifting made easy

  • Mandatory lacrosse attendance new graduation requirement

    Entertainment

    How to give back this holiday season

  • Mandatory lacrosse attendance new graduation requirement

    Features

    “Wear it” out

  • Mandatory lacrosse attendance new graduation requirement

    Features

    In the beginning, there was coding

  • Mandatory lacrosse attendance new graduation requirement

    Features

    What do you want to be when you grow up?

Navigate Right
The award-winning voice of North Cobb High School in Kennesaw, Georgia.
Mandatory lacrosse attendance new graduation requirement