Poltergeist: North Cobb edition


Tara Anastasoff

Spirits haunt the halls and parking lots of NC after discovering the hidden Cherokee Indian burial ground.

Andrew Gasparini, Reporter, Photographer

Construction workers unearthed a Cherokee Indian burial site below the old lacrosse practice field in early December 2016 shortly after the commencement of building NC’s new, new gym.

Stephen Revard, Assistant Principal and Association for the Burial Rights of Native Americans president, recently released a press statement regarding the impressive archeological feat.

“North Cobb has kept the information concerning the discovery of a Cherokee Indian burial from the public because we wanted to make sure that the materials uncovered were authentic and not just a lost headdress from our wardrobe department,” Revard said.

Administration shocked students and teachers with the news that the additions to NC will continue despite displacing the skeletal remains of hundreds of Native Americans.

“How can we call ourselves Warriors if we are disturbing the final resting place of our school’s mascot? We are orange? More like we are grave diggers!” senior and leader of Students for the Upkeep of the Cherokee Kin (SUCK), Giovanni Merendino, said.  

Several students took it upon themselves to protest the unfair and cruel situation and boycott NC by not attending classes.

However, during all the commotion, strange events occurred throughout the hallways, courtyard, and fields that left the Warrior Nation shook. Desks and tables flipped upside down, and television screens went monochrome and screeched static noises.

NC also reported that a freshman, Katie Word, went missing, and people could hear her voice through the PA System: “Where is everyone? Did you guys leave class without me?” Word said. Her parents hired parapsychologist Melanie Shelnutt to locate their daughter and bring her back from the other side.

Shelnutt claimed that spirits of the Cherokee people will haunt NC until their remains return to where they belong. Angry ghosts continue to plague the halls, tormenting students while they walk to their classes.

Junior Anthony Graham hung upside down from the ceiling above malfunction junction with the help of supernatural forces, causing the already traffic-filled hallway to back up even more.

Furthermore, a ghost shaved sophomore Patrick Wright’s hair during one of his naps in Magnet Chemistry, despite the absence of scissors from the class.

“Someone needs to fix this problem because I don’t want to be next. I ain’t afraid of no ghosts, but I really don’t feel like losing a fight against some angry poltergeists,” Merendino said.

SUCK continues their fight for the restoration of the Cherokee burial ground and plan to protest outside the construction zone this upcoming Wednesday after school.

April Fool’s, you fool!

XOXO, The Chant